It’s been a long time since I posted. Some of you know already why. My brother died on January 2nd and it really threw me for a loop. Close to three months later and I am still feeling a little lost and just going through the days, heading to my freelance projects and doing what needs to be done, but not really feeling completely like myself.
But a few things are happening that at least give me something to look forward to. First, I am going to Matera, Italy for a writer’s retreat 10-15 April. I can’t wait. I need to be in the company of writers, I need to be in Matera and feel the love and warmth of that wonderful town. I have not written a word of fiction since my brother died and I feel incomplete not being able to write fiction.
And in May I will celebrate 20 years of being married to my wonderful guy. Just think: we started off as that couple everyone thought would only be a summer fling. We’ve been together as a couple now since 1993 and got married in 1999. And I absolutely adore him.
Weightwise, I am in a stall and I am not stressing about it. I know that, since January, I have not always been as vigilant about what I eat as I should be. However, my clothes continue to feel looser so my body is still redistributing things. I am getting back on track though. And I am hoping that now that I am seeing a grief counselor to deal with my brother’s passing that this will help me regain the structure I’ve lost.
One thing though that makes me happy is that I am only around 15 pounds from my goal weight. And I feel good physically, even if mentally I feel a mess. One thing at least that has made me happy is discovering Turmeric Tonic at Pom & Flora, a café here in Stockholm. It was zingy (thanks to the ginger in it) and not too sweet. And today’s lunch–Thai style vegan sweet potato soup with chickpeas and glass noodles–was delicious!
So, no, I have not forgotten about my blog…I’ve just been dealing with my own emotions and trying to come to grips with the fact that one of my favorite people in the world–my younger brother–is no longer with us.
Bear with me. I promise I will be back to normal soonish.